MORE awards!!!!!!

I have a few very important things I need to take care of today. Namely...

I GOT 2 MORE AWARDS!!!!!!!!!!!


Cant read the fine print? It says, "You're looking at a Kick Ass Blogger"! Hey, hey people, this is like a license to kick ass or something, so you just watch it. Not like I have any reason to kick anyone's ass cause you guys have been so lovely and wonderful, really, but step out of line and face the wrath!!!!! The wrath of a kick ass blogger!!!! WOO!!!

Hmm, these awards really make me into a bit of a tyrant, huh? My bad. I'll try to keep it in check, but I make no promises.

ANYWAY, I was given this award by Petra over at The Wise (Young) Mommy, who writes a hilarious and addicting blog about her life as the mother of 2 young kids. Her style is reminiscent of sitting down with a good friend, which I love. Go read her stuff or you'll get a visit from ceiling cat tonight at the least opportune time. And that would just be awkward. And with awards come nominations, so I'd like to pass the love on to:

1. Vodka Mom
Her hilarious comments on my posts make me laugh, and I've really enjoyed reading her blog over the past few days. An excerpt from her site, "I like to fuck up at least once a day. It keeps me humble." This is like my new motto, people. Go check her out.

2. Venus Angell over at For a Pessimist, I am Pretty Optimistic
This girl gets the Kick Ass Blogger Award not only for having a seriously funny blog with great pictures, but for her Bravery In The Act Of Posting. This post alone was creeptastic, and girlfriend went the extra mile by finding 14 different pictures. That's dedication.

I also got an award from Sassy Mama Bear over at Cafe At The End Of The Universe. She runs a cute, fun blog full of great pictures and inspirational posts. I hope things are going better for you, Sassy Mama Bear and you're feeling much, much better.

As you can see, she gave me the Addictive Blog Award:


I'm like heroin! Crack-cocaine!! Look at that little monkey, he's like, "Hell yeah, this is some good shit!" I am totally down with being an Addictive Blog, and I consider it a great honor. Just promise me you guys will never go to rehab, okay?! They cant do it like I can!!! And if I'm not enough to keep the shakes at bay, try taking a hit off of these guys:

The Hypocritical One over at That Tears it...!
I'm a newbie to his blog, and what an addictive blog it is! His entry about Right Laners made me re-think my position on the road, and I literally LOLed when I read his comparison to the random clips of the Chinese gymnasts being akin to seeing the Grady girls in "The Shining." Exactly. Go read it.

Chat Blanc over at Wit's Bitch
Her suggestions on how to avoid an awkard next morning interlude would have come in handy 6 years ago, but I can still appreciate a good getaway plan. And she's starting a cult, too! Haven't you always wanted to join a cult? This one has chips and salsa that never end!!!! Go read her blog and you'll soon figure out exactly what I mean by seriously addicting.

So THANK YOU so much again to Petra and Sassy Mama Bear! And thank you, too, to all the guys who read and comment on the craziness I decide to post. Have a great weekend, guys!

I GOT AN AWARD OMG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Look what I got!! Look at it!!!!!!!


This is my VERY FIRST AWARD EVER and I am just ridiculously, over the top excited about it. Look at that beautiful prism of greatness!! Doesn't it just speak to you? Doesn't it make you feel empowered?!?! It says, "I am a prism! I represent all that is awesome!"!!!! I just want to snuggle with it and stroke it's pointy little head. I am so humbled that Amy over at AmyOops decided to bestow this amazing award to me. And look, it even comes with rules!!! I always wanted to implement rules! This rocks! I AM empowered!!!!!

Very Important Rules That Shall Be Followed Or I Will Hunt You Down And Rip You Of Your Title Forever Causing You Great Shame And Humiliation
l. The award may be displayed on a winner’s blog.
2. Add a link to the person who you received the award from.
3. Nominate up to seven other blogs.
4. Then add their links to your blog.
5. Add a message to each person that you have passed the award on to in the comments section of their blog.

Whew, what a rush. Here are my nominees:

Kirsten aka Reverend Doctor Kirsten Valentine over at The Soccer Mom Files
She's been getting awards left and right these days, and that's cause she's a pimp. Oh yeah and she's funny and blogs about important and relevant topics (to me) like skymall, the voodoo knife rack and martinis.

Monique at Blogging More
This girl is a funny, well written, sassy little fellow Texan and I like it. I first felt connected to Monique when she posted about her love of shoes, and we share the common bad habit of calling out your mom.

Grumpus at When Things Get Dark
Ya'll, they don't call her Grumpus for nothing. Her sarcastic writing makes me feel at home, and her recent post on Nightingale Poop Facials had me cracking up. And intrigued. And - yes - googling where I can get one. I'm a sucker for the latest trends, what can I say.

Ege at The House and I
Smart writing AND humor for when you need some intellectual stimulation. Apparently she loves bacon just as much as I do, and who doesn't love a good rousing game of "Would You Rather" (apparently called Zobmondo?), featured every Wednesday on her blog.

Deb at Deb on the Rocks
If you aren't reading Deb, you are missing out on the good shit. Her post on surviving the summer got me laid AND kept me cool - who doesn't want to learn those tricks? And you gotta give respect to anyone who can fake an orgasm with 1,000 women and look good doing it, too.


Congratulations, ladies. Treat the prism with love and respect, and it will do the same for you. See how wise this award has made me??!??! I rule!