Look, I consider myself an intelligent person. Grounded, philosophical, secure in the knowledge that I am
...Okay, so my spell check feature is ALWAYS turned on, I'm the queen of run on sentences, and the three languages I speak are English, Spanglish and Toddler. No one is 100% perfect, right?
But knowing that Justin Long and Drew Barrymore just broke up, or that Dinah Lohan is a fame whoring attention hound isn't exactly going to win me the Pulitzer, if you get my drift. I mean, all this useless knowledge is probably taking up room in my head. If I didn't read about Pam Anderson at the Big Brother House last week, I might have done better on yesterday's Jeopardy! (I am a faithful Jeopardy watcher. See how smart I am!??!?) . Also, I really don't care about Brangelina (they had the chosen ones, by the way), Christian Bale (would totally do him, but only as Batman) or Lauren Conrad (seriously, I'm not that sure what she does. The Hills, right?) and while I envy their ability to purchase cute shoes without a financial doubt or worry, I dont aspire to be like any of them.
What it is, I think, is I use celebrity gossip like the rest of the world uses TV for escape. I watch 4 TV shows regularly, and only 3 of them are in season right now. That is the most TV I have ever watched, except for my brief addiction to MTV when I was 15.
But even if its the truth, I still get looked upon like an inane airhead when I confess to strangers or acquaintances my deep and ardent affection for the tabloids. Somehow, TV watching isnt that bad in comparison and I don't know why. It seems just as dumb and indulgent as reading gossip columns, right?
One good thing, though, about knowing a lot of useless celebrity information is kicking ass in Trivia. Do you know who Phoebe Price is? Bai Ling? Shauna Sand? Have you heard about Lindsay Lohan's legging line? And join me up with one of those TV watchers, and we will take your ass down in the Pop Culture category, faster than you can say Jamie Lynn's backwoods baby.