Monday, October 27, 2008

Me, some strippers and lots of vodka - Halloween 2008

So are you guys as excited as I am for Halloween?!?!?!?! HALLOWEEN! WOO!

Sigh. Whatever. I can't keep up that falsity - Halloween is annoying.

Seriously. We're actually going out this weekend, and guess who I'll be hanging with?

This girl:


Who'll tell me she's in med-school and isnt this a "cute little spin" on her Halloween costume? Later, her two best friends, Tranny Teresa and Ditzy Diane who are either DRESSED as strippers or actually are strippers (I've had a few drinks by this point) show up.
Then this guy will try to pick me up:

but luckily he'll be hypnotized by Tranny Teresa's boobs and forget about me. Being around the three should be Playboy models will get me self analytical and then I'll start drinking a lot of these:

give up all hope for flat abs and start dancing like this:



get disapointing looks from my boyfriend, go home, and pass out in my costume. I'll wake up the next morning with a killer hangover, and my boyfriend asking me what the hell was I talking about last night when I said I was going to buy the "stripperobics" DVD's and one of those collapsing dance poles?

Cant. Wait.

22 comments:

Heinous said...

I like the sounds of your party much better. All I need is a costume.

Athena said...

Haha! Just dont go as the snake guy!

Stripper Poles said...

That would be a great Halloween costume.

Ms Picket To You said...

went to a party this weekend. must say the dick in the box couple really rocked.

Petra a.k.a The Wise (*Young*) Mommy said...

hahahaha. Dude, I'm sorry. I will spend my Halloween traipsing around in the cold with a 2-year-old monkey and an 8-year-old wearing three different superhero costumes and then spend the rest of the evening trying to prevent them from eating so much candy they barf all over the house...gosh, our lives suck.

Chat Blanc said...

no worries girl, I'm pretty sure that guy's "snake" can poison any skankiness you don't want to hang out with! ;)

Kirsten said...

LOL! Everyone has to be a "sexy" something for Halloween now. I effing hate that!

ettarose said...

Yeah what the hell is it with the sexy. Can I be OLD and SEXY. I think not my friend. Even old men don't want old women. I may go as a Muslim woman. All covered up from eyes to toes!

Athena said...

Stripper poles - What would? A stripper pole?

Ms Picket - Yeah! Dick in a box!

Petra - That was me last year! It almost sounds more appealing to me than going out...my kiddo is going with her daddy this year.

Chat blanc - ugh! isnt that costume fucking awful?

Kirsten - Seriously. Witches were not meant to be sexy! I want to see someone go as a sexy zombie this year, damnit! Step it up a notch!

Ettarose - LOL hell yeah you can be old and sexy! You wouldnt want to try out the sexy zombie mentioned above, would you?!?! ;)

just a girl... said...

love the snake guy, oh lord.

The Hussy Housewife said...

I agree, Haloween is just a excuse for every one to dress like sluts and not be judged for it!

This hussy can't do that no more..got kids to tow around!

Sandee (Comedy +) said...

Bwahahahahaha. I'm not a Halloween fan at all. We go to the boat to avoid the million kids that come to this neighborhood. I like your let's have too many drinks idea though. Have a great day. :)

Athena said...

just a girl - seriously, right? SOOOOO creative!

Hussy - hahah CPS would be on your ass, fast!

Sandee - girl, I hope after my kid is grown I can one day do the same thing!

Keely said...

I love Hallowe'en but it's supposed to be SCARY. I get so annoyed with the 'sexy' (skanky!) costumes. I'm all about the blood & guts.

Well, okay, these days I'm all about the kids and the candy. But usually I'm about the gore.

quarter-life lady. said...

Ain't that the truth. I think I'll be in hiding this Halloween. Fully dressed.

JD at I Do Things said...

Oh, funny.

Why is that snake guy always at the parties?

I will be home, hiding in the basement with the lights turned out to discourage trick-or-treaters and watching a gory movie.

Woo!

JD at I Do Things

Athena said...

Keely - Seriously! Monsters! Vampires! Serial Killers! Put away the thigh highs and pimp hats already.

quarter-life lady - LOL this is what it's come down to now!

JD - Your plan sounds awesome! Are there margaritas involved? Or perhaps, "bloody marys"? Hahahahahaha...

Dr Zibbs said...

The portable stripper pole is a better invention than the cotton gin. That's just my opinion.

VE said...

If you really want to scare me, go as my boss!

Athena said...

dr zibbs - That pesky cotton, restricting privates since the 1500's!

Ve - LOL! Seriously!

QuirkyLoon said...

I think I might dress up as Rosie O'Donnell.

Is that scary enought for ya?

LOL

AngieSS said...

Hahaha I'm with you -- Halloween sucks. Except for the candy I pilfer from my offspring! :)