Anyway, since real life has taken a precedence this week, here are my top 5 favorite key word searches:
5. Need a fucking good knife
Is this a question? Are you trying to sell me something? WHY do you need a fucking good knife? Whats with the 'f' word? I sincerely hope you did not find what you were looking for here. Also for all you other peeps looking for a fucking good knife? Try academy first.
4. Fruit bat costume child
Okay. Have you ever seen a fruit bat? Click here if you are un-informed. What the hell? Why are you dressing your poor child as a fruit bat? The only excuse for this is if your son or daughter is in some sort of wild life play, or they just have a bizarre interest in fruit bats. Children are weird - have I mentioned my four year old child wants to be a duck? Somewhere, someone is looking at their analytics saying, "child duck girl costume" and shaking their heads.
3. Fat yarn rolls
Ohmygod, please tell me that there is not a BBW yard doll fetish. And if so, HOW did my site become associated with it? That is simultaneously awesome and terrifying.
2. Peeing in the sink
Really, people? You actually need to google "peeing in the sink"? What the hell can you be looking for that you don't already know? Instructions? Do you have a peeing in the sink fetish? Is it limited to only in the sink? Cause if so, that must be some hard material to find. I cant imagine how many "sink peeing" fetishists I disappointed. Sorry, guys.
1. What gay men do with ice cream
I am intrigued. What DO gay men do with ice cream? Are there any gay men who can answer this question for me and the one other person who googled this? Now I feel like I've been wasting all my opportunities for some good, kinky fun by simply eating my ice cream!
I also want to announce that I am now a member of one of the most prestigious, amazing kick ass blogging groups out there - humor bloggers dot com! Thank you to the darling Ettarose who asked me to join up and blog funny with the other awesome peeps who are seriously way talented and hilarious. I am in the presence of greatness! Get your asses over there now to read some of the internet's finest humor, snark, and general insanity - especially now that I'm a part of the clan.